Saturday, August 1

I'm a 1950s Husband

Yup. The other day (well a few weeks ago actually, before I came down with this horrible lurgy) I came home from a tough day at the office and had a delightful meal on the table for me. How quaint!

The first course was this tomato and onion bruschetta. I properly love bruschetta. I know that's probably damaging my Scottish person street cred, but I do.
This was the main course. It's tripoline pasta which is kinda like frilly linguine with tomatoes, aubergines, and roasted peppers. What a lovely thing to come home to on a Friday evening. That and a glass of wine and I'm good to go.

Tuesday, July 28

I Win at Veganism

I've decided.


This is why:

Clean up your drool. That, my friend, is caramel shortcake aka millionaire's shortbread aka nomtastic aka a-little-piece-of-my-childhood. As far as I'm aware it's quite a Scottish thing and is served in school canteens all over the country (we don't agree with our children having teeth apparently).

I started out with this recipe, which was okay but if I'd actually followed it, this would have probably been disastrous. It's quite unclear (for example it doesn't state what temperature to cook the shortbread at, so I had to guess), and quite a lot of it I just plain didn't agree with, so I changed. I somehow managed to remember most of the changes I made, and in an uncommon move on my part, I'm actually going to post the recipe. I know! How often do I do that?!

Caramel Shortcake/Millionaire's Shortbread

150g (6 oz) vegan margarine
75g (3 oz) sugar
175g (7 oz) plain flour
75g (3 oz) cornflour


300g sugar
60g vegan margarine
6 tbsp soya whipping cream
2 tsp vanilla

200g of plain chocolate


  1. Add the margarine and the sugar to a mixing bowl and beat together.
  2. Mix in the flour and corn flour until well mixed and crumbly.
  3. Press shortbread mixture into an oven proof dish (I only had a round cake tin and that worked fine, but for proper nostalgic slabs of cake, I'll need to get a rectangular one).This should be pressed in quite firmly, I used the back of a spoon to level it out.
  4. Bake at 170 for 20 minutes or until just beginning to brown.
  5. Let the shortbread cool.
  6. While the shortbread is cooling you can make your caramel. In a large pan, melt the sugar BEING VERY CAREFUL NOT TO BURN YOURSELF ON THE MOLTEN SUGAR LAVA. Once all the sugar has melted, it should be a lovely golden colour. Add the rest of the caramel ingredients and stir through.
  7. To tell if your caramel is ready carefully place a drop into a jug of cold water, and if it forms a soft ball between your finger and thumb then you're doing grand.
  8. Pour caramel over your now cooled shortbread.
  9. Melt your chocolate via whatever method you like and por over the caramel layer.
  10. Put in the fridge until the chocolate sets.
I thoroughly reccommend taking it out of the fridge and letting it get back to almost room temperature before eating it as this is when the caramel should be optimally gooey.

Enjoy! If anybody has any questions, feel free to leave a comment or shoot me an email (I just added a link up on the top right hand side).

Saturday, July 18

Teaching Boys to Cook

Well, just the one boy really. I've been working crazy mad all over the place hours recently and although I do enjoy the boy's tofu stir fry, it was getting a bit dull having it every day. So! We decided he needed to learn to cook, and as it turns out, he's actually rather good. Score!
This was spinach pasta with a light, lemony, creamy sauce, with kale, onions and pine nuts. On the side is pesto potatoes. It was absolutely blinkin gorgeous, and I got to have leftovers for lunch the next day.

Uber win.

No, you can't have him. No, he doesn't have a brother.

Also, just for good measure, here's a pepper I only went and stuffed the other night. Poor bugger, he never stood a chance.
It had tofu and rice and kale (oh my!), which are possibly three of my most favourite things in the world ever. Okay, so maybe those aaaaand my iphone.

Sunday, June 28

Finals Will Eat Your Soul

Yes they will. You may or may not have noticed my disappearance. You may also have noticed that I like bullet points. Therefore, here is a lame bullet point list stating the reasons for said disappearance:
  • Final year exams. I existed mainly off of popcorn and ramen noodles. You dont want pictures of popcorn and ramen noodles.
  • Moving house. Yep, onwards and upwards.
  • The whole graduation shebang. I got a 2:1, which considering I had surgery twice in my final year, I think makes me an utter genius.
  • I started a new job. It's management-y and fairly demanding.
Anyway. A few weeks after I finished uni I celebrated with my boy by making a sushi feast. The boy had never had sushi before and judging by the way he gobbled it up, I think it's safe to say he liked it.
The sushi had spicy tempeh and spring onions. We had it with teriyaki dipping sauce. Absolutely completely nomtastic.
This is an unnecessary close up of the sushi.
I also made some Inari sushi stuffed with sushi rice and spring onions and at the front is the leftover tempeh from the sushi which was marinated and fried. Proper delicious.

You'd probably think that was too much food for two people, but you'd be wrong. We gobbled it all up in a worryingly short space of time. I'd do it again.

Ooooh! I just ordered an iphone! I'm mainly showing off, but if anyone has any good app recommendations, that would be much appreciated.

Friday, March 6

Dosa and Tarts

Yup yup.

This was vegetables roasted in cumin, coriander, etc (by etc I mean I can't for the life of me remember) on top of a dosa which had some tikka masala (dairy free jarred brand from the health store) sauce on top. Yeah baby

This meal was made to use up leftover pastry from the Snow Day Pie. It's pastry rectangles, with sundried tomato sauce, chorizo red onion, mozzarella cheezly, and oregano on top. It was the yum. Served with salad salad and potato salad. Yes.

Saturday, February 14

Snow Day Pie

My office called on Thursday and said not to bother coming in because of the snow. I didn't argue and spent the day in my pyjamas watching the pretty snow outside. I also decided that as it was snowing, some stodgy food was required. What I ended up making was the best pie I have ever put into my mouth.
I roasted some brussel sprouts, carrots, and onion and then added some chopped vegideli sausages and simmered in some of Mr Henry Westons fine organic cider. I then added some onion gravy and into the pie bottom it went. Obviously it was then covered in pie top.

Best. Pie. Ever.

I want more now. There were not enough leftovers. Never enough.


Thursday, February 12

I'm posting to avoid doing my homework.

No really. Leave me lots of comments that need answered so that I can avoid it some more. Go on, enable me, you know you want to.

This breakfast came out of a craving I had for a fry up from the Grassroots Cafe in Glasgow. As I was not in Glasgow I decided to make my own. Tempeh bacon, toast, beans, herby tomatoes, and what really makes the Grassroots breakfast (which a lot of people find quite odd) garlic mayo. I wasn't in the mood for making myself feel ill, so I left off the potato scones. I think the mark of a good breakfast is the ability to have awesometastic lunch leftovers. This turned into tempeh bacon, tomato, and garlic mayo sandwiches for lunch, which was just the best thing ever.

Continuing along in my mission to test all of the new Grassingtons vegan range, I recently tried out the beef style meatballs. Served here with penne and arrabiatta sauce. I love these meatballs. Love. The instructions said to either bake them or fry them. Being the rebel that I am I ignored this and baked them, then fried them, then added the sauce. They plumped up nicely and were lovely and moist. Love.

Sunday, February 8

My Poor Teeth!

A post full of cavity inducing sugar on the way.
French toast. Bananas. Strawberries. Agave nectar. Bish bash bosh.
Ice cream with chopped up dairy free fudge and agave nectar. This was so disgustingly decadent I almost slipped into a sugar coma afterwards. You know what makes this more disgusting? It was eaten as dessert right after the fatty melt episode. I was clearly trying to kill myself with food that day. It's the only explanation.
This was the boy's birthday cake. I was the weird girl at the birthday party who demanded the lights must go on when the cake came out because I had to take a picture. Then I got all the questions about why I was taking pictures of food and explaining what a blog was. It was fun. Alas, the picture is still a bit crap because once again I was fairly inebriated. What is it with me being drunk around cake?

Saturday, January 24

Lelly's Fatty Melt with a side of Irony Salad

Back in October when I stumbled upon this monstrosity, my initial thoughts were eww and *vomit*. After the initial shock though, I vowed to veganise it. Why? Because I have this fixation with occasionally making the trashiest, godawfully unhealthy food around, and sometimes I just have to give in to the urge. What can I say? I'm Scottish, it's in my blood.

Anyway, this was remarkably easy to make. I cut the bread into squares roughly the same size as the burgers and then squished them down to make the bread really thin, and then put a slice of tofutti cheddar and vegideli bacon in. Instead of frying this like the recipe, I foremanised it, and then when the burgers were done grilling, they were put in between the grilled cheese sandwiches along with ANOTHER slice of cheese and ANOTHER slice of bacon. The result was the following artery clogging badness:
If you look closely at the top left hand side you can see the cheese oozing out of the top grilled cheese sandwich. You see that? That's pure atherosclerotic magic, that is! The boy also pointed out that in this picture the sandwich looks like it's poking out it's 'cheesy tongue of artery clogging defiance' at us. You can also see some of the bacon sticking out. Is everyone thoroughly disgusted enough with me yet? Good. For the record, I could only eat half of one of these and the boy ate the rest of my half. Also, don't you just love the irony salad? You know the rules If you're having something as disgustingly bad as this, it's okay, as long as you have something green on your plate too. It totally balances out. Also, everyone knows the rule about how all the calories are in the last bite, and so since the boy ate the last half of mine, I'm fine... Right?

Thursday, January 22

I've been busy, okay?!

Yeah yeah, so I know you're all bored of this little routine I have where I post regularly for a while and then I stop and can't seem to get my blogging groove back on and so I post apologising. I'm bored of it too, so I won't apologise. I will however inform you of all the new and exciting and scary (oh my!) things going on. Okay? Okay! As my friend the Debatron can attest to (this is really just a test to see if any of my friends read my blog), I like bullet point lists, so without further ado, here is the Bullet Point List of Things Which Keep Lelly Busy:
  • Uni! I'm in my final year, and I've somehow managed to be doing two dissertations (it's a whole big thing), so yes, I've been frantically, and often not so frantically working on that.
  • My face! You know how my face is filled with fail and will one day have the inside bits replaced? Well on the 30th of December (yes, I had a bloody great New Year tyvm) I had surgery to possibly delay this whole replacing of the inside bits thing. They froze my joints with a cryoprobe which should supposedly freeze the nerves, and thus freeze the pain. So far, I'm in as much pain as I was before AND I have the post surgical pain AND I have a rather hefty scar AND I have a hefty bald patch. Oh yes, they shaved my hair and didn't tell me they were going to do this until afterwards. The scoundrels! This kept me busy and off the solids for a while.
  • In December I had a big scary interview and presentation to do for a postgraduate course in teaching. So preparing for that, and then afterwards constantly refreshing the page to see if I'd been successful was rather time consuming.
  • Guess what guys, I got in! AND they waived their usual condition that biology students must have a second class degree or above for me. They just liked me that much. But well, who doesn't? So yes, I know what I'm going to be when I grow up again!
  • Is this a food blog? I think it just might be. Let the food blogging commence!
At Christmas I was in Glasgow and demanded that my mother helped me find some of the Grassingtons products. By demanded, I of course mean that I asked nicely. Anyway, I got some of the steaks, the chicken things, and the meatballs. So far I've tried the first two.
I actually really really liked this, which I suppose is odd considering I don't think I've ever eaten steak. It's tasty, tender, and handy to have in the freezer. From what I remember it wasn't actually that expensive either.
The chicken thing comes already marinated in some tomato thing. I served it atop some bulgur wheat, with roast potato salad on the side. Oh yeah, and some balsamic glaze on top. Hmmm... What to say about this? Well! Words cannot describe how very much I disliked this. It made me feel ill. I don't know if it was too chickeny, but I don't remember eating chicken so I wouldn't know, but it had these weird fibre bits that thoroughly freaked the everloving bejeesus out of me. DO. NOT. WANT. In fact, looking at the picture is making me feel a bit ill. *shudder*

Anyway, in other news, remember how I made a companion cube cake for my friend a while back? Well, someone who was also at that party (although I have to admit I do not know too well) liked the cake so much he requested I make him a cake for his birthday. Did I mention he wasn't vegan? Booyah. Anyway, he played it a bit fast and loose with the instructions, just that he wanted the same lemon cake. As previously mentioned I do not know this boy too well. Things I did know: 1) He's a nurse. 2) He likes Batman. 3) He does not seem to approve of our trend of naming people after the shapes of their heads. Anyway, this brief led to this cake:
I very very nearly put a little red cross on the bat logo, but I stopped myself. Why? I was thinking "if this was a professional cake and I did that, would it end up on the bizarre section of cake wrecks?" Oh also, the mess of blue and yellow border was all pretty squiggly lines, but then I couldn't fit the cake in my fridge and the icing melted a bit. Boo. Oh well. I have another cake to make soon for the boy (you know, the boy). Cakes seem to be like buses, you don't make one for ages, and then three come along at once. Err, or something.